Do You Need X as Much as You Think You Do?

Purpose

In today’s world, we seem to be constantly chasing something; a new job, a new house, more money, more time, new cloth, a new partner, a new car, a new gadget and on and on. This chase is becoming a major source of anxiety for many people. It is like you live in a world where you can have a lot, but you are not getting much. The problem is not with you though. The problem is that several significant trends in the past century have led to the explosion of content, products and experiences. The availably of all of this is of course great for society. It makes living richer and more rewarding but it also means that today’s people would feel that they are missing out on a lot; in fact, more so than any other people in history simply because we have a lot more available to use.

As such, to reduce any potential anxiety that arises as a result of all this abundance and our inability to have it all, we must consciously practice being content and appreciative. By being content we focus on what we desire the most and take pleasure in having it. By being appreciative we focus on what we already have and feel happy about our good fortunes.

Many techniques exist for practicing being appreciative or content. Here is an exercise that help you in this regard. The questions can be answered individually and with as much time as necessary. The following instructions are provided as a guide in case you want to use the exercise during a training course and then follow it with a general discussion.

Objective

Answer the questionnaire and then reflect on the answers given.

What You Need

• A copy of “The Appreciation Questionnaire” for each delegate.

Setup

• Distribute a copy of “The Appreciation Questionnaire” to each delegate.
• Ask the delegates to answer the questions.
• Allocate about 30 minutes. Please bear in mind that since this is a personal questionnaire, people will be working on their own for the duration of the activity. As such, it may not be suitable for certain interactive training courses as it would be an extended amount time where people would be quietly working on their own. In a multi-day course you should give the questionnaire as homework and then discuss it in a follow up course.
• Explain that delegates don’t have to share anything they don’t want to and it is important that they provide honest answers rather than censoring themselves because of others.
• Bring back everyone together. Go through each question and ask volunteers to share what they have written. Don’t force anyone to share anything if they don’t want to though. The aim is to share ideas so that people can get inspired by answers given by others.
• Allocate about 10 minutes per question.
• Follow with a discussion.

Timing

Explaining the Exercise: 2 minutes

Activity: 30 min filling in + 10*10 min discussing = 130 minutes

Group Feedback: 10 minutes

Discussion

What did you think of the questions? How easy was it to answer? Which questions were most difficult? Which questions were most helpful? Which one of your own answers surprised you? Which one of other people’s answers did you find inspiring?

The Appreciation Questionnaire

Do you need money as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week that doesn’t require money but that it will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need time as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week that doesn’t require any extra time but that it will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need someone else’s attention or company as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week that doesn’t depend on someone else’s attention or company but that it will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need friendship as much as you do? List three things you can do during the next week that doesn’t involve a friend but that it will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need luck as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week that doesn’t require luck but that it will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need a promotion as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week for your work that doesn’t necessarily contribute to a promotion but that it will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need a new job as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week in your current job that will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need a new partner as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week with your current partner that will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need a new house as much as you think you do? List three things you can do in your current place during the next week that will certainly boost your happiness:

Do you need a new _________________ [fill the blank with any desired possession] as much as you think you do? List three things you can do during the next week without having this that will certainly boost your happiness:

Reflect on your answers given about. How do you feel now that you have answered these questions? How do you view life? Did you have difficulty answering any of the questions? What does this suggest?

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